well i'm sitting here and i've decided to come back to this page that i've not been to in far too lang. i think by now all the thousands of people that used to come to this site are finally gone and i can finally just write. (right, and not like i wanted it anyway). i've really nothing to say, like usualy. not even a good story. i'm felling kinda sick... screwy in the head from it, and it's not too fun. i'm consistently tired, and it may have to do with the late nights with my girlfriend but i fall asleep there... that's why it turns into such a late night. anyway, i hate being sick. i'm flat broke at the moment, and it's scary. i'm actually very frightened at the idea that God may not help me out with a miraculous appearance of money this time. i'm in a huge hole and i need to find a way out. my girlfriend is trying her hardest to help me out, but i'm stubborn and besides, she should have to do such a thing... or even want to to the extent that she is. i love her so much. she truly cares for me in a way that i can't comprehend. if only her parants care about what she thought about anything the way she cares form me. that's a fun topic. anyway, i think thati'm done for now. i hope to stop by more often. ciao. until then---